And People Wonder Why I'm An Atheist

What is a Cherub? A miserable pile of random animals, but enough talk, have at you!

@Puchu: hi nate
~Huge_Spatula: Puchu while you look like the traditional baby faced cherub, you do not match the original description
~Huge_Spatula: The biblical prophet Ezekiel describes the cherubim as a tetrad of living creatures, each having four faces: of a lion, an ox, an eagle, and a man. They are said to have the stature and hands of a man, the feet of a calf, and four wings. Two of the wings extended upward, meeting above and sustaining the throne of God; while the other two stretched downward and covered the creatures themselves.
~Huge_Spatula: How can you have four faces?
+Lonk: a lioxgleman?
~Huge_Spatula: Also the feet of a calf? What species of calf? And why a calf and not the adult version of said animal?
+Lonk: I dunno
~Huge_Spatula: That is not a very good description at all
+Lonk: but cherubs sound delicious
+Lonk: actually, they sound like hotdogs
~Huge_Spatula: I wonder if their wings are as delicious as chicken wings
+Lonk: quite possibly!

Send In The Clowns

This is NOT what I expected when I ordered my "Grand Slam" breakfast!

@Grumbledook: pancakes
~Foolio: that was random
@Grumbledook: but it was good
~Foolio: pancakes are always good
~Foolio: if thats what you mean
@Grumbledook: that too
Lonk: even while being anally raped by a clown?
Carrotsanta: how does it taste in that situation Lonk?
Lonk: well...maybe that would be good for the clown, if he's the one eating them
~Foolio: Lonk knows this from experience
Lonk: pancakes? clown rape? or both?
~Foolio: both at once
Lonk: can't say that i do
~Foolio: i know you do
~Foolio: i played A Lonk to the past
Lonk: did you rescue princess Zulda from the evil Gonnonderf?
~Foolio: no i turned it off at the part where i had to rape a clown while eating pancakes

Not-So-Kosher Cupcakes

Some jokes are in bad taste. Some leave a bad taste in your mouth. This one... both?

Lonk: i remember killing a conversation once by asking if it would be wrong if an easy bake oven were sold with little jewish action figures.
Lonk: as a joke, of course.
Myra: o.o
Lonk: they could help me bake cupcakes!

Improving race relations, one candy bar at a time

Martin Luther King, Jr... Lyndon Baines Johnson... Barack Obama... Lonk

Myra: i seriously do hate chocolate lol
Bow: but why? it releases happy ions
+Solude: chocolate is good
* +Solude waves snickers bar
@jonas: milk chocolate is an abomination
+GL-san: dark chocolate.
Lonk: dark chocolate tastes like ass
+Solude: you know what ass tastes like?
Lonk: perhaps
Tapela: You never go ass to mouth, Lonk
@jonas: you have the taste of a teenager <_<;
Lonk: no i have the tastebuds of a fatass, actually
~Foolio: snickers is a god-tier candy bar
Lonk: do they make a dark chocolate snickers bar?
+Solude: i think so
@jonas: Lonk, yes
Lonk: and do they call it Sniggers?

Fun fact: In Mexico, 100 Grand bars are called "Less than Minimum Wage" bars